So my days in Grenoble are coming to an end, and I am left here with some serious mixed emotions. To start off- this semester has been by far one of the best life choices I have made, and while it may have been an expensive life choice, it was worth every last penny. I had to make some sacrifices coming into this experience, and even here. But the value of overlooking Grenoble from the Bastille, or all of Paris from the Eiffle Tower is priceless. I have finally seen places that I have dedicated years to learning about- places that I doubted I would ever see, but only dream about.
However, some of the sweetest, most precious moments of this semester cannot be summarized in pictures, you cannot browse my photos and know the feelings I had. What made this experience so sweet was forming the relationships that I did along the way. The experiences that can't be captured on film or recorded are the days you eat lunch with a friend, and have real talk about everything in life, its having a slightly tipsy heart to heart on the way home, running/walking up the Bastille. Its sitting on a beach in Nice, eating packaged waffles and drinking strawberry water, and talking about everything there is to talk about. Its letting go of your inhibitions and kissing in public, dancing in a park when there is no music, and dancing in the kitchen while pancakes are frying. Its enjoying an ice cream cone on a bench by yourself on a warm afternoon. Its splitting a baguette and nutella with friends in a park on a splendid afternoon. Its reconnecting with Jesus while sitting in a magnifincent cathedral. Seriously- how can you go in a cathedral and not feel moved by some sort of presence? Or for that matter, look at the Swiss Alps that surround you, and not feel insignificant, knowing there has to be something bigger, and higher out there. And it is really hard to the leave the people I have made these memories with. The knowledge that this experience can never be duplicated again is a big pill to swallow.
But, as sad as I am to leave all of this behind- there is a part of me that is happy to be home again. I am so excited to see family and friends again! I very much look forward to having my life again. Having the option to drive, money to spend, and feeling productive, are just a few of the things I look forward to.
There are some personal changes that I will be making thanks to a semester in France: one, I am going to update my wardrobe a bit, adding lots more black and neutrals. I will be phasing out lots of my older clothes, namely sundresses and bright/pastel colors. I have really taken a liking to French fashion, and I would like to incorporate as much as possible into my "real life" wardrobe. Secondly, I have learned how to eat well here, including correct portions. I never really realized how much we do eat at home until I left, and slimmed down a bit. And no more fast food. Ever. No milkshakes, fries, etc. I never ate it that much at home to begin with, and after having gone a semester without, I am perfectly content to never put that stuff in my mouth again.
So, needless to say, I am feeling a little bittersweet at the moment. So for those of you at home, if I seem a little wistful, or I talk about France too much, please don't be offended: it has become a big part of who I am, and the people here have heard quite a bit about you :)
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Monday, May 9, 2011
The Horizon
There are certain things I would like to see happen in the future of our world. I would like to see a world where every woman has the ability to make the choices she wants, without any fear of persecution or humiliation. In this vision, "Jessica" from rural Alabama can see the world beyond her small town and its narrow idealogoy, and she can return to loving arms whenever she wants. "Anna" from Somalia will have regular access to birth control, and will not fear her husband's disapproval, and they will not have to bury children who die of starvation or other preventable illnesses. She herself will not die in childbirth, leaving a husband and several small children. Little Maria, in the remote Andes mountains, will always have crayons and coloring books. Emily from Illinois chooses to stay at home and be a mother without criticism from "feminists." On the same token, Katy graduates suma cum laude from Yale, and will go on to be a surgeon. I want to see every Muslim woman make the conscious choice whether or not she wants to wear the veil, or a burqa. If that is her choice, that is completely acceptable. And if she chooses not to, it is equally acceptable. I want to see every child in the world have a healthy and happy childhood, without ever living in fear of bombs, or a parent drinking too much and hitting. I want a world where 13-15 year olds are not committing suicide in atrocious numbers because of bullying or choices in sexuality.
~~~~ I want to see a world full of healthy and clean fruits and vegetables. Not bio-chemically engineered pieces of cells we call "food." Monsanto is quietly destroying the world, and few people even know it. Thanks to this company, and many others like it, we are ingesting the ingredients for cancer on a daily basis.
~~~~~~~ My wishes are very idealogical and common. It is one thing entirely for me to sit and here and name the problems I see in the world. (sarcasm) "Congratulations me! Way to point out the obvious!" We know the problems that exist, we know that evil is in the world, and there will always be suffering. But it just seems to me maybe we could all try a little harder. One of my favorite writers, Nicholas Kristof of the New York Times, inspires every time I read a blog post or article of his. And his writings make realize that I have done virtually nothing to contribute to the world. We all like to think that the little things we do are helpful, but are they? I do not necessarily aspire to achieve the most profound, human changing establishment around. But there has to be a little something I can do, right? I want to be pretty honest in saying that I feel my measly few dollars that go in the offering plate do not really go that far, and even if I were to go somewhere for a month, or even summer, I do not see that as having a lasting impact on someone's life.
~~~ Personally, I find that many of the charities that exist benefit the giver more than the recipient, and that the giver has this nice, warm fuzzy that we did something. But did we?
My friend told me about a sermon at her church where the minister said, "1,000 children died of starvation last night. And guess what? The majority of you don't give a damn; further, that same majority is more shocked that I said 'damn' in church than that many children died". What is sad, is that this is 100% true.
The question that I must ask myself is what I am going to do? I know that at the end of my life, I want to have done something worthwhile. I am tired of being passive, and saying that I will do such and such when I'm older. I have made a very conscious decision that I want a life of substance that benefits other people. I have been extremely blessed in my life; I have never gone without, and I have so, so much. The simple fact that I am a high school graduate who has had regular meals and health care, is so much more than most women in the world can say they have.
I will not change the world, any reader knows that. But maybe I can change the life of just one child. If I can at least do that, then I can go in peace.
Here is a link that got me thinking about all this: http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2009/08/26/magazine/20090826-a-womens-world-reader-photos.html#/0
~~~~ I want to see a world full of healthy and clean fruits and vegetables. Not bio-chemically engineered pieces of cells we call "food." Monsanto is quietly destroying the world, and few people even know it. Thanks to this company, and many others like it, we are ingesting the ingredients for cancer on a daily basis.
~~~~~~~ My wishes are very idealogical and common. It is one thing entirely for me to sit and here and name the problems I see in the world. (sarcasm) "Congratulations me! Way to point out the obvious!" We know the problems that exist, we know that evil is in the world, and there will always be suffering. But it just seems to me maybe we could all try a little harder. One of my favorite writers, Nicholas Kristof of the New York Times, inspires every time I read a blog post or article of his. And his writings make realize that I have done virtually nothing to contribute to the world. We all like to think that the little things we do are helpful, but are they? I do not necessarily aspire to achieve the most profound, human changing establishment around. But there has to be a little something I can do, right? I want to be pretty honest in saying that I feel my measly few dollars that go in the offering plate do not really go that far, and even if I were to go somewhere for a month, or even summer, I do not see that as having a lasting impact on someone's life.
~~~ Personally, I find that many of the charities that exist benefit the giver more than the recipient, and that the giver has this nice, warm fuzzy that we did something. But did we?
My friend told me about a sermon at her church where the minister said, "1,000 children died of starvation last night. And guess what? The majority of you don't give a damn; further, that same majority is more shocked that I said 'damn' in church than that many children died". What is sad, is that this is 100% true.
The question that I must ask myself is what I am going to do? I know that at the end of my life, I want to have done something worthwhile. I am tired of being passive, and saying that I will do such and such when I'm older. I have made a very conscious decision that I want a life of substance that benefits other people. I have been extremely blessed in my life; I have never gone without, and I have so, so much. The simple fact that I am a high school graduate who has had regular meals and health care, is so much more than most women in the world can say they have.
I will not change the world, any reader knows that. But maybe I can change the life of just one child. If I can at least do that, then I can go in peace.
Here is a link that got me thinking about all this: http://www.nytimes.com/interactive/2009/08/26/magazine/20090826-a-womens-world-reader-photos.html#/0
Monday, May 2, 2011
2011
We only five months into 2011, and I honestly feel like it has been the most eventful year in my life; globally, politically, and personally. On hearing the news of Bin Laden's death, I was shocked, and almost in a state of disbelief. Seeing justice served to the person who brought my nation so much grief and pain was incredible. I choose to see his death more of a symbol rather than actually celebrating someone's death. His death symbolizes the end of an undercover tyranny. It is the end to someone who tried taunting and shrouding Americans in fear, and won for a short while. The unfortunate fact is that there are others who are willing to step up to his plate, but seeing the mastermind behind 9/11 gone is something I will truly never forget. All of the Middle East uprisings, and demands for leaders to step down has been another huge event in 2011. I saw Egypt throw out their leader, same with Cote d'Ivor. I saw people from Cote d'Ivor demonstrating in front of United Nations when I was in Geneva. At the time, I did not know the magnitude of what I was witnessing, but as the events unfolded, Ilearned that I saw something huge. The Royal wedding took place this year. While it may not have been overwhelmingly important, it was still a very historic moment that will go down in text books and be in museums. I have seen enough museums and portraits this year to know that their day will forever be remembered. Even 200 years from now, when school children meander through a museum, they will see the portraits of King William's wedding day. I was in Rome merely days before Pope John Paul II was to be beatified. While I am not Catholic, that was still something very historic that I had the opportunity to witness. On a less positive note, I will also never forget the natural disasters I saw this year. As for my personal life, so many, many wonderful blessings have happend: I have had the extremely wonderful opprotunity to pass the semester in France, which is one of my lifelong dreams finally come true. I have lived with a wonderful host family, and learned to speak a new language. I was accepted to UNC Chapel Hill, and I am enrolled! I met, and have the best guy I could ever imagine, who exceeds my expectations. Yes, 2011 has been quite a year for the world, the US, and myself. I can only imagine what the second half of this year could possibly be...
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